Caislen Campaign Notes

Chuck Norris left the real world's mortal plane on March 19, 2026, at age 86. He immediately transcended to godhood in this campaign setting.

• Greater deity of martial arts, strength, endurance, impossible feats, roundhouse kicks, never surrendering, and bending reality through sheer awesome badassery.
  • He belongs to no pantheon of deities. Instead he is his own unstoppable pantheon of one.
  • Chuck Norris would defeat The Moose in a fight even with disadvantage.
• Alignment: Chaotic Good (or “Lawful Chaotic Awesome”). Followers may be of any alignment that values personal strength, endurance, and never quitting.
  • Alignment checks fail if look him in the eye.
• Divine Domains: War, Trickery, Life
• Holy Symbol: A beard so majestic it has its own initiative roll.¹⁾
• Favored Weapon for followers: Unarmed strikes.
• Rangers who worship Chuck Norris gain an extra 10 movement speed because they are Walkers.

Temples are dojos. Prayer is training and sparring. Holy water is replaced with “tears of Chuck Norris’s enemies” (which, according to the faithful, cure cancer). Holy Water may also be any water in which Chuck Norris has some significant connection with²⁾. Followers emphasize personal discipline, martial excellence, and refusing to quit.

• Core tenets for followers:
  • “When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot and roundhouse it.”
  • “Pain is temporary. Quitting is permanent. Chuck never quits.”
  • “If at first you don't succeed, roundhouse-kick reality until it does.”
  • Never surrender. If Death comes knocking, answer with a spinning heel.
  • When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot and roundhouse it.

The following is a guide to help create a Cleric of Chuck Norris. This of course started as a joke and now we're trying to make it playable, using this as an outline.

• Domains
  • War (primary and strongest thematic fit — front-line martial cleric)
  • Trickery (for the impossible, reality-defying feats and “facts”)
  • Life (optional secondary choice — for the “pain is temporary, quitting is permanent” resilience theme)
• Once per long rest Clerics of Chuck Norris may quote a Chuck Norris “fact”³⁾ and it becomes reality briefly.⁴⁾
• Divine Order (level 1):
  • Protector is the strongly recommended choice for the martial fantasy. It grants proficiency with martial weapons and training with heavy armor.
  • Thaumaturge is viable if the player prefers a more caster-focused build.
• Domain (level 3):
  • War Domain is the natural fit. PHB page 76.
  • You may however opt for the Trickery or Life domains instead.
  • Bonus Action: Unarmed strike (fists). Mechanically treated as a +3 to hit/+3 to damage magical vorpal unarmed strike. War Domain’s War Priest feature explicitly allows an Unarmed Strike as a Bonus Action. Normal Strength & Proficiency bonuses are also added to the attack. A 19 or 20 counts as a critical hit.
    • Reminder: An unarmed strike normally does 1hp + STR modifier as damage. So the formula for this is 1+STR modifier+3 magical as a bonus. The 1+STR modifier count as bludgeoning damage and when relevant the magical 3 is vorpal damage.
  • Walker Florida Cleric is the first player character Cleric of Chuck Norris in the campaign.
    • Additional lore and quirks will be derived from this experience.

Since the Alchemy Bottle has spent some serious time in the possession of Eyrun and has largely been used to produce bath water during her tenure with it, and said bathwater belongs to none other than Chuck Norris… it is fair to assume that the god Chuck Norris would be rather perturbed to have small increments of his bath water, aka holy water, stolen randomly, and at one point completely drained while The Party dealt with moisture hungry minions of the god Torralta. Therefor Chuck Norris must know who Eyrun is and may hold a bit of a grudge, which could be left for his followers to contend with. This doesn't mean he outright hates Eyrun, but it does mean she's owed a roundhouse kick.